Saturday, October 23, 2010


its been a while blog.. since i blog..
well that prob that i post here ( i think 2 posts back) is starting to come around again..
i think i must confront this prob and settle it..

i must...
i should..
but what if...
i shouldnt..
but u shouldnt do this way..
what did i do to u??
i deserve this?

so many question running through my head.. a friend suggested.. if she wont see u.. leave a message on FB.. let her read and think it through.. and maybe settle things by then or leave it as it is..

im thinking of taking the plunge and gamble on that..

god! im ranting tonite.. most of it doesnt even make sense.. but i feel slightly better.. huh... neways its time to sleep... cheerios mate..

Thursday, October 14, 2010

Heartbreak.... NOT!

haha.. well.. alrite im not heart broken.. but i feel broken somewhere tonite.. i dont know if its a matter of the heart... but it kinda feels weird tonite..

just an up and down day today... many highs... but as many lows... huh.. well thats life i guess..
and tomorrow's gonna be one heck of a day.. (crap.. forgot of my italian presentation... yeah im taking Italy this sem for electives.. i wonder if there's TISL.. teaching italy as a second language... haha... dah2.. this is very menyimpang...)

that just shows how weird life is when it comes to mood.. not really much on heartbreak.. but so and so i guess.. hahaha... and how i can go from bit emo to downright happy again.. i dont know..

just gotta brace myself for tomorrow... hope for a better tomorrow la... hahaha... well the disappointment of today makes us stronger for tomoro...

alrite2... this was supposed to be an emo post... lol... i cant get emo when its all bout typing this kinda stuff.. but.. i just wanna share this quote i got from BONES (Tv series.. season 4)

"If you truly love someone, you have to prepare your heart for suffering, as the one you love can break your heart and yet you can also break the heart of the one you love, that'll change the way you look at yourself..."

I always wondered y i sometimes get cold feet when it comes to this kinda things... and with this quote i realized that i have a prob with either commitment or that fear of breaking another persons heart... i WILL not be able to look at myself the same if i do... that fear... i think it consumes me.. I used to think it was because i was too nice of a guy.. thus some girls are scared to break my heart?? hahaha.. that i dunno till i find a girl who does.. but i guess thats the fear of breaking another's heart that makes me scared to this kinda stuff..

well at least that paragraph above was somewhat emo..
neways.. i gotta get some shut eye... Cheerios.. Ciao...

Sunday, October 10, 2010


young love is beautiful... well sort of hahaha...

this thing that has been in my head...

now where shall i start... i really wonder... coz this is just some thing that has been in my head.. and its been there for a while now...

whenever i feel somewhat jiwang or bored at night... this issue would just come up.. and appear to me.. out of nowhere... its annoying really.. i just hope i can get over this problem soon or it will be troublesome..

so whats up with this issue??

its just well.. in a guys life... among the common problems we encounter would be GIRLS... rite?? haha.. well i guess for most guys la..

so this is just a problem i have right now... with a can i call her friend anymore??.. i wish i could.. but if i think of how we are hypocritical to one another now... it just begs to differ...
i just wished of the what ifs... what ifs in life really gives us a lot to thing about..

well back to the problem or issue..
i met her somewhat 3 months back.. and just the steps in knowing her was some what fun... she appear fun, warm and also blur..
and from that time on till i say last months i felt like we did grow close.. but over one incident i guess thats where all this things started to appear..
i mean no doubt i sorta had this u know.. i like u feelings.. but nothing more.. i wont even tell her dat.. and i know u didnt know..
but then that fateful day.. the batch event or course even where we went for a picnic at KLCC with everyone..
thats where u finally found out... i guess it was my fault also... i confided with my best bros that i sorta like u... but how'd the other coursemates... the girls find out i seriously didnt know..
and i know the drubbing or so call main2 that they kenakan u on that day was somewhat too much jgklah...
and i know it was such a drubbing... seriously guys next time if i like another girl im keeping it all to myself.. except to the bros.. just bros. and the rest please dont do this kinda drubbing again..
i mean what girl would like to know that another guy liked her from all the guys friends... that is just so not cool... i admit that would be my fault.. but how u treated me after that... i mean we were never even in a relationship and yet u treat me so..

and even after that i heard bad things about u.. about how u are a play-girl and all.. but i didnt care for at that point i was like.. well after the drubbing the friends i had did... all was lost..

next was i guess on how did she treat me...
i guess every time when we met after that.. u seriously acted like i was not in front of u and i guess i not only played along but also did the same... we saw thru each other... that was just sad lah...

but i guess we are both hypocrites la then.. i mean during the openhouse the other day... we could actually sit together and talk together like nothing ever happens.. and a week after that we just continue to act like we both dont exist to each other...

just i feel that its a lil bit extreme to act that way... even removing tags from FB.. lol.. why dont u just remove me from ur friend.. wont that be easier...

come on... we had nothing.. nothing... i never even said i like u and u act like we had a bad break-up.. WTH la..

well i guess thats as much rambling i can do for tonite..
its good to clear the head before bed... ^^